Sit comfortably and get some popcorn because today we’re going to talk about NetGalley and what it means to be both lost and found.
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Out on the 3rd of September 2019[/caption]So. I decided that my life needed a turn, that bookish world is too small for me to be confined only to my local bookstore or library or online book shopping, and that’s why I signed up on netgalley.com.
I had already joined the website once but didn't really know how it worked, and back then I didn't even have a platform to use where I could share my thoughts on books or write reviews, so I deleted the account and created a new one so that I could start this new adventure, hopefully with you guys alongside.
Basically, the whole premise is that on this website you can request books that are about to be released, so that you can read them for free in exchange of an honest review, and this is what we're going to do.
I will try and keep this a monthly column, see if I can put one of their books on my TBR - and actually get to them - so that I can give you more contents on new releases, but no promises. This is episode #1, in any case, and we're going to talk about a book that I found very whimsical and important, a book that it was hard to put down and what's could be a better start of this new journey?
Now, if you’ve gotten the popcorn I mentioned at the very beginning of this post, please take a very comfortable seat and get ready to delve into this review. Be aware of the fact that is going to be a little heavy, as the topics we’re going to touch are sensitive and very relevant to society, but you’ll get all the warnings you need to get, so don’t worry about it. Just don’t expect this to be a lively chat, that’s all.
As usual, first of all a little bit of generality, so that we can get to know our host of the day – month? Week? Who knows! – and we can play the part of the perfect masters of the house.
Today’s review is about We Are Lost and Found, a young adult novel written by Helene Dunbar who the Paint Magazine has called the queen of heartbreaking prose. You will be able to find the finished copy on the shelves on the 3rd of September 2019 and believe me when I say that, even if you don’t know it yet, you can’t wait to read it. I can’t wait to have my own copy so that I can finally highlight and tab every single comma and show the world how precious and important this story is!
We follow Michael’s year before graduation and we are living the 1980s in America. His brother Connor has been kicked out of the house because of his sexuality and he has to lay low in order to avoid the same fate. At his side there are James, a very enigmatic boy also is a performance artist everyone wants but no one can have, and Becky who is not scared of words and who seems to be the only one not afraid to call things as they’re supposed to be called. She’s my personal favorite—but we’ll get there eventually.
Back to Michael’s story, all you need to know is that he’s about to graduate and he doesn’t have any clue whatsoever about what his future should look like, nor what he should do slash wants to do. At the end of the day, he’s living in the 80s in an America that is still changing and evolving; his father is angry all the time, despises LGBT community and has high expectations for his youngest, given the shame the oldest of his sons had thrown on the family. There’s this new disease that is killing people way too fast and scares those who have been lucky enough to not catch it yet. There’s The Echo, the safe place where Michael can hang out and be himself, where he can forget about everything scary that’s in the outside world and in his life, and where he meets Gabriel, a guy who seems to see him rather than James. And that’s probably scarier than any disease or unknown future.
This is pretty much a coming of age kind of novel that despite its being whimsical and melancholic – just as I like it – also carries a few trigger warnings: LGBT+ theme touches a very dark subject, as we’re talking about homophobia that is not only verbal but also translated into gestures and episodes that get violent at times – not too graphic, tho, but still gives the creeps and makes the reader a little uncomfortable. AIDS topic as well is something you need to be aware of, because despite the fact that the author chooses to deal with it in a very delicate way, it's very heavy to digest as it's very actual. So if you feel like you might be a little sensitive about them, this is not the book for you. If you think, instead, that you’re brave enough to try and understand the emotional burden that comes with this story, then you’re more than welcome, my friends.
I will talk about pros and cons altogether because I didn't find many flaws, but that's just my opinion, and the ones that were there aren’t that objective, so I didn’t really consider them when I rated the book.
I guess that I’ll start by saying that what I loved the most about book it’s definitely the cast. I couldn’t help but sympathies for every single one of the characters, all so different and unique, but more human and realistic that many more I've met in my bookworm career.
James loves art and is working hard to be a performer because it’s through art that he can actually express himself and his feelings. He somehow it reminded me of some of the characters in La Chica del León Negro. I don’t know, he had that kind of vibe, the one that makes you feel like James is the closer an author can get to depict you without actually knowing about your mere existence. His fears, his doubts, the fact that maybe people don’t really understand and there’s no one out there to make us feel safe anymore…
In a year full of changes like the one we read about in We Are Lost and Found, I thought that James more than Michael was fitting the atmosphere of the book better. His doubts were somehow reflecting and embodying the feelings of a population that was going through changes without guidance and without knowing what was coming up, what was going to happen next. In the same was as Vladimir and Estragon were representing human kind in their search of truth and faith, James was symbolizing the uncertainty that was running through the LGBTIQ+ community back then, that inevitably spread all around the States and not only during said years.
Michael is our narrator and I guess he’s pretty average; there’s nothing extraordinary but nor ever ordinary. He’s a boy who thinks a lot mostly because he’s lost and he feels like he’s trapped in a life that doesn't belong to him at all. He can’t live life as carelessly as his brother, but he also knows he can’t hide for the rest of his life because this equals to undo himself, live in fear. At some point, he needs to find and embrace his personal turn, and probably it’s thanks to Gabriel, the only character I didn’t quite care about nor liked, that Michael understands his needs better. Even if I didn’t like Gabriel almost at all as I found him flat and just barely outlined, I reckon that he’s necessary to Michael's growth, but that’s about it in my opinion.
I found myself in a lot of Michael’s insecurities and those parts in which he got lonely or lost were very hard to ignore. They made me think and made me feel like someone out there was understanding, finally. So I guess I can safely say that even if my baby was James, Michael is a well developed character, after all, because he doesn’t stay flat and sometimes makes mistakes like we do. I love the fact that Helene managed to create a character that grows realistically and for this reason somehow he managed to get a soft spot inside my heart.
I also loved the way he seemed to be lost but every time it looked like his friend, who loved him dearly, managed to find the truth in him even when at his lowest. Their friendship was so meaningful and extraordinary that I ended up being totally sucked in their dynamics and history. It almost felt like they were my friends and not Michael's ones.
Becky, oh my my! She was my favorite because of the strength she showed throughout the novel. She tried a all costs to shield her beloved from what might have hurt them and barely thought about her own feelings. She was the deepest of all the characters Helene gave life to and somehow managed to steal my soul completely. Becky is also a girl who was successful in accepting herself and her main struggle is about her family situation that she has no clue who to make it better. Her resolve was also a very strong trait; Becky is the kind of character that knows what she believes in and what she wants and she would never stop in front of anything. She was kind of the counselor of the group and one way or another everyone turned to her when something was wrong because she could put things into perspective. She’s also very stubborn and I guess this is the main reason why I felt she was very close to me. It was easy to understand her and her feelings, and in a lot of behaviors and psychological mechanisms I saw myself.
Another thing that deserves praise is Helene’s writing style. As I said a lot of times, it’s whimsical and lyrical, but at the same time is naked, bare. There’s no space for anything more than the message she’s trying to deliver, she speaks the truth and only the truth. Helene is able to tell us a realistic story without many frills and makes the reader see a little bit of themselves pretty much in every single comma. Hers is a significant story not only for the important topics she tries to highlight, but also because it helps people to understand that it's okay to be lost, sometimes; it's okay if what the future might bring scares us and it's okay to not fit the "canon" society imposes. It's okay to be ourselves and to be as such at our own times. Also, it's okay to fall and get hurt, but the most important thing is that we stand up again because a scratch, as big and painful as it might be, doesn't draw the deadline.
Also, Helene Dunbar tells us about a reality that has been forgotten, somehow left behind because of how much medicine has progressed nowadays. She takes us in a America that was darker than the one we know today, that was going through a massive change and was doing it blindly. We live that America on our skin and I find it admirable, as I found a little group of authors able to work this kind of magic.
Talking about AIDS as the main topic of the book and doing it with such a delicacy and respect was admirable as well. Helene's not trying to lecture us on how the disease works, how develops, how to recognize it and treat it. She focuses on the psychological aspect of it, on the perception of something so new and how it made people feel in an attempt to raise awareness, trace a timeline that can help people avoid to make the same mistake once again. What she pushes her focus on is definitely the responsibilities that come with a relationship. Helene's main point is that when in a relationship, whether it's friendship or partnership or whatever, we're responsible for two people (or more) and not only ourselves, so we can't always be selfish and think only about ourselves, above all when it comes to safety and respect of the other's boundaries.
What I definitely appreciated the most is that at the end of the novel we can find two sections that are dedicated to some of the main personalities in History that were considered the pillar of AIDS fight and research, we can see historically speaking the way this battle has been directed and managed, but also what the outcomes have been, what are in recent days.
I found it really useful and informative but also very short and this made me a little upset because I was so engaged that I wanted to know more and more and more, but I do understand that the book is not a manual on HIV and AIDS, so I had to make the information be enough.
I think Helene Dunbar makes a great job when it comes to talk about responsibilities and what happens when someone feels lost and doesn’t really have an anchor or a rock to turn to when it comes to make decisions that will inevitably impact our future. She also makes sure to never discourage the reader; yeah, there’s bad in the world but there’s good as well, and if we can find the courage to take said good in our hands and make the most of it, then we won no matter what.
Life is hard and sometimes it comes with obstacles that are harder than we think to overcome, but this doesn’t mean that they will never be.
So if you happen to be around and find a copy, please pick up this book and read it giving the story the attention that it deserves. It’s very important that people get to know these kind of topics, whether they are part of the LGBTIQ+ community or not, even if it's just the crumbs of this part of history of the world – of the LGBTIQ+ community specifically – because it’s better to have a little knowledge rather than none. We need to be the change we want to see in the world, said someone once, and I totally agree.
The only flaws to me were two and pretty insignificant when it came the time to rate the book, because as I said they were more personal preferences than actual flaws of the book itself. Specifically, Gabriel was the one who gave me the most problems because I found him annoying, pretty flat and very poorly outlined, one of those character you can't get attached to at all because they're not designed to be part of the cast that is going to steal your soul. Also, the love interest was pretty nonexistent to me, and would've worked better with another character, but that's okay lol.
Number two was the information at the end of the book, that I wished were a little deeper for those who, like me, are very curious, but I understand that I can't have everything and if I want to quiet my hunger I can easily go online and do researches myself without seeing a touching story turning into a textbook. So it wasn't this big of a problem, after all.
Five stars all deserved, because I’m still thinking a lot about this book, its topics and its characters, even days after I finished it. It became one of my favorite of the year and I can’t wait to go and get my physical copy so that I can cry over it over and over again while I put my tabs.
Before I go, thanks to netgalley.com and to SOURCEBOOKS Fire for sending me this E-ARC and giving me the chance to delve deep into this very touching story and thanks to you all, my readers, for sticking with me despite the fact that when I start to rant about something it takes me ages to get to decide when to stop. But I guess we’re on the same boat, here, so.
All the love, my dear bookworms.
S.
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